What’s the world coming to?
Brief by Central Staff
Media – August 2001 – Colorado Central Magazine
We’ve all read about dogs that can sniff out drugs. But in an article about teenagers using uncontrollable substances at Platte Canyon High School, the Park County Republican quoted Undersheriff Don Lamb: “We’ve run drug-smuggling dogs through the school.”
We’re trying to imagine such K-9s — perhaps a St. Bernard with something other than brandy in the little keg under its chin?
The same article also quoted a reformed student: “I wizened up a bit.” But he probably “wised up” after his adventures in a boot camp, since “wizen” means “to shrivel up.”
(Either that, or the boot camp was much too stringent — allowing for neither food nor water).
Despite a headline in The Herald Democrat — “Lake County nurses battle obesity” — Leadville’s nurses have not all joined Weight Watchers. But in an effort to prevent childhood obesity, Lake County’s nurses are advising families on proper nutrition and exercise.
Also, in this very same edition of Colorado Central we’ve got “large employers” who aren’t necessarily any larger than anyone else. But when we tried to amend the problem, we couldn’t find an appropriate adjective and thus ended up with corrections like, “employers of more employees.” So we tried changing “large employers” to “large corporations” but it didn’t mean quite the same thing — and the subsequent paragraphs were all about the attitudes of “employers.”
Finally, we thought, “oh well,” and left it — hoping that perhaps this double entendre will provide a moment of amusement to some readers.
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